Stress… That crippling poison that frequently tries to run through your veins. Tugging at you through out your crazy day. Poking you in the temple while you try to catch some Z’s. Growing larger and heavier and hanging out on top of your shoulders like a kid at a parade. How did it get there? Well, just like the kid at the parade didn’t get on your shoulders without your help, the stress didn’t get there without your help either.

It is invisible, this stress. No matter how abundant it becomes. And though invisible, it is quite painful and so very damaging. Yet, without realizing, we continue to give power to this negative side effect of Life. Stress begins with you, and ends with you. You keep giving it it’s own life, but you can also kill it. So, kill the stress. It sounds so simple, and… it is.

Because stress, essentially, is hidden fear. Fear that we consciously or subconsciously have chosen to hold on to. Fear of the unknown, fear of the future, fear of the past, or our own made-up fantastical possibilities. It is us, slipping away from our authentic selves. For whatever reasons, we choose to become fearful of so many things, creating these unnecessary stresses that take over our beautiful lives.

Fear of not enough money. Fear of being hurt. Fear of what’s to come next.

Fear = stress. Stress = fear. Kill the fear = Kill the stress.

We all want to be stress-free in this amazing life, but we also have this false notion that we can’t be stress-free. That stress is a part of life that we must coexist with. But coexisting with internal stress keeps us from living to our full potential and seeing the big picture. Most of the aches and pains and illness that we experience is self-induced through the stresses that we’ve given power to.

When Byron and I first adopted my three nephews, my mom became very ill, we didn’t know where we going to live, and my sister was lost on drugs. There was so much going on. I had so much fear, fear of adjusting to a new life, fear of being a parent, fear of what would come next. So much stress that I didn’t even know what to do but give it all of my energy and power. And it took over. Not realizing at the time that I’d given it full permission to live and grow within me.

The stress ran rabid inside of me and took on a whole other life of it’s own. I started having panic attacks, which I’d never had before. I began frequently blacking out and losing my memory. Many times I’d come to, behind the wheel wondering how I got to where I was. My pre-diagnosed chronic costochondritis, (inflammation of the cartilage between the sternum and ribcage), became so agitated that I was mostly immobile much of the time. I was losing feeling in my legs, feet, toes, arms, hands and fingers. My vision started to go in my left eye almost everyday.

The stress had literally possessed my entire body like an evil entity.

The Doctor told me without a doubt that we were probably seeing the signs of multiple sclerosis. In my early 20’s, becoming a parent to three boys, planning a wedding, looking for somewhere to live, taking care of my mom and hunting down my sister… oh, and a possible diagnosis of MS. That is what stress does.

Months went by of seeing so many different doctors and undergoing so many tests. Some days got easier, some days got harder. We were adjusting to life. Finally the neurosurgeon scanned my brain. We waited for the results, where I was shown a beautiful image of my beautiful brain. With no lesions. I was shown my own crystal clear bill of health, and I walked away without a terrible diagnosis… and a huge weight of ugly stress lifted from me.

Reflection began to kick in. I realized how much stress and fear I’d been holding on to, and how I allowed it to take over all of me entirely. And after that, I killed it. I killed the stress… I threw away my fears. I started getting back into my center, and my authentic, healthy self started to shine brighter than ever.

So, how do we actually kill the stress?

First… we must recognize it. You know you’re stressed out, yes, but what is your stress, really? What fears have you been holding onto or creating? Answer that question, honestly and fully. All fears – big and small. Writing them down is even more healing and helpful.

So now you have a list of all your fears, which is essentially all your stress you’re holding onto. Go down the list… asking yourself if there is anything you can do about each fear, if there is a solution in your control, or if it is completely out of your control. Write down any solutions, if there are any.

Just looking at your list will help you to breathe a little easier. You’ll reflect on those silly fears and come up with easy solutions if you can. And if you can’t come up with any solutions then what is the point of giving any space to any of those fears on your piece of paper? There is no point! So erase those fears. Kill the stress.

You’ve become aware of what you’ve been holding onto and giving power to.

Now sit there, with your stress… and cease giving power to it by simply shifting your awareness to love and gratitude. Stressed about money? Stop. Stop thinking about the money you long for, and instead think about all that you have already in this very moment. The shirt on your back, the food in your fridge, the roof over your head.

Stop your stress by focusing on what you have to be grateful for in this very moment. Stop your stress by realizing and reminding yourself how much love is in your life, and the love you have within you. Kill the stress by taking back your power and energy and putting it toward your gratitude and love.

Feel yourself become lighter and more relaxed.

When we are in that moment of realizing what we have to be grateful for, and feeling all the love inside and outside of ourselves -then that’s it – that’s where we are – in that moment. We allow ourselves to relax and breathe and be present when we become aware of our gratitude and love. When we are present, we are authentic and free of all stress and fear.

It is that gratitude and love, and your present awareness of it that conquers all the stress and kills the fear. Stress and fear can literally take over our lives if we allow it to. But when we re-center, breathe, and remember our love and gratitude, then we have nothing to fear. We have no more stress. And we’ll walk in the higher vibrations of love and gratitude.